Addictions Therapist

I was a junkie for over 8 years off & on. I would kick then go back over & over again. I could never stay clean for any real length of time, I always seemed to need something even if it was just pot or drinking liquor. It seems looking back that I have been high most of my life( sad as that is) here I am just days away from my 30th birthday & I really want to be done with that whole scene however, I feel as though I am cheating because I’m doing methadone maintnance & for some reason that feels like cheating to me like an easy way out. However, I am clean other then the methadone & I haven’t been able to do that like……ever so I do feel sort of good about it but like I said not as good as if I were doing it with nothing. I just wish I could feel this good without taking anything.I guess I’m just one of those people who always needs something. Are there any ex-junkies out there who are doing well without useing anything?